Writer – satire

Once I met a Dutch girl in Sao Paulo, and she told me she didn’t believe Brazil was dangerous, because in the month she spent there, nothing had happened to her. People say travelling broadens your horizon, but I’m a writer. The last traveler to broaden horizons was Columbus, the next to do so will be the one to discover aliens. So if you’re a traveler, and what to share about it, try to rather collect proof of extraterrestrial existence. Because we don’t need more fieldwork on how hot it is in Barcelona.


Some people laugh at vegans, but I don’t, because I’m a writer. It makes sense to me that, since they are against murdering innocent creatures, they hate seeing or hearing about it. Imagine we, comfortable citizens of Poland, whose worries are whether we should drink tap water and where to spend our summer, were suddenly thrown into the throes of war and daily saw people dying around us. We would feel exactly like vegans in front of a hamburger.


Bipolar people can’t get balance, so they either feel too much happiness or too much sadness. My advice, as a writer, is to do like the rest of us, and learn to feel nothing. Good wine and a dull job would do the trick. Sadness only exists when you yearn for happiness. Out of the mind, out of the heart.


Bullying is very widespread in the U.S, but I’ve rarely seen it in Argentina or Poland. You always see American kids in films standing up against their bullies. I’m a writer. I’m not here to fight physical fights. You can hit me once, but I’m later calling the police and the bullying ends there. By outsourcing my violence, I let the bullies be bullied by their peers.



I'm a writer born in Argentina, but currently living in Poland. I work as an English and French teacher, translator and copywriter.

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