-He: So, what do you think?
-She: I don´t know.
-He: What you don’t know?
-She: I´m not sure.
-He: What aren´t you sure about?
-She: I don´t know.
-He: I think I prefer playing Russian roulette with a machine gun to talking with you. It makes more sense. It’s not that you’re blond but that you’re so openly blond.
-She: But I’m not blond.
-He: Metaphorically speaking.
-She: Does it even have a meaning: being metaphorically blond? Or you’ve just come up with it to insult me.
-He: Truth hurts but it doesn’t offend.
-She: Well, your way of telling truths offends me and hurts me.
-He: How can a soulless creature like you take offense at anything? You have no god, you go with the flow of your senseless life. How can anything be offensive to you?
-She: Well, as you said once: Being offended is a personal option, and I choose to be offended now. That way it hurts less. And how are you better than me? You have a meaningless soul. You believe in eternity but do nothing about it.
-He: I don´t believe. I want to believe and there lies the difference. I don´t want to believe this is all there is and beyond there´s just dust and oblivion. If I had less intellect I would be a Christian and call Jesus to my aid. You know where the whole strength of their faith is? In their tenacity. A bunch of people believed in something and died for it. Then other people changed their whole lives after becoming believers. That makes their faith true: It´s a grandiose example of wishful thinking.
-She: Yes, but this tenacity comes from their fear of darkness. I believe the strength of their faith comes from their desire for a light in their path. But the lamp they hold in their hands doesn´t allow them to get real enlightenment.
-He: Because we love the darkness rather than the light, and therefore our works are evil. I sometimes walk around when I´m overwhelmed or go to a party when I`m invited by friends or, when I`m single, to meet someone, but I generally seek loneliness and darkness because I´m a lonely and dark spirit. Happiness is not my real self. I´m not a Buddhist escaping pain but I want to be acquainted with all the pain of the world.
-She: Do you think all religions are just a means of escape from reality?
-He: The more I think about it, the more similarities I find between meditating to reach a state of peacefulness and having a Messiah sacrifice himself to redeem us from sin. In both cases, we´re escaping from the intrinsic pain of life.
-She: I know I wish life were full of light, but instead it`s full of darkness. I can´t overlook the darkness because I wouldn´t be truly living but just gliding through life, as most people enjoy doing. Whether it´s God-fearing people or atheists, what everyone has in common is their unwillingness to suffer.
-He: We all want to touch Heaven with our hands and we all know that enlightenment is most of the time not worth it. The myth of the forbidden fruit in Eden represents this perfectly. If we want knowledge, we need to pay with suffering.
-She: But what`s better? To live in sweet ignorance or to draw the curtains back on a desolate scene?
-He: For some, ignorance feels like enlightenment. I wen to an Evangelical meeting not long time ago. A girl gave the testimony of her conversion and she explained that she saw God in the trees. At that moment I thought: What a hippy, but now I think she´s right. There´s a soothing attribute in trees, because they’ve been around longer than us, and they don’t struggle; they just live a full life. It’s the opposite of stars, which are mysterious and distant, reminding us of our pettiness and ignorance of the vastness of the Universe. I see God in trees too, but I don’t know why she needs the Bible then.
-She: -But that’s not the worst part. The worst is that people believe they know everything there is to know. Take justice for instance. People believe they know what justice is. Whether it’s the commandments given by an omniscient god or the law developed by jurists, people think they can tell right from wrong. They think that the justice system sometimes fails, when actually it always fails to do real justice.
-He: Guilt is something too personal to be judged upon by a second or third person and the punishment has nothing to do with guilt but with revenge and social terrorism. We are all sinners but only a few selected ones hold the key to hell: The judicial system and its spawn:
-She: Prison.
-He: There are better ways to redeem our sins than punishment. Once I broke up with a girl, but then she met her current boyfriend by going to the meetings of a group which I had created. I feel I´ve paid my debt to her.
-She: Isn´t that a little condescending from you? Thinking that she wouldn´t have met anyone were it not for you?
-He: No, she’s Polish and Polish people are socially awkward, though very friendly. They need a push. Just give them an easy task to do like giving you directions. They will send you anywhere just to talk with you for a second. You’re the exception, though. Your spirit is so free that I don´t think it could be confined to a single country. You’re rather like a Gypsy.
-She: Well thanks. So I´m a blond Gypsy then…
-He: You aren´t blond anymore. Your hair has just turned dark.
-She: And do you still think that Russian Roulette makes more sense than me?
-He: No, you changed my mind. I think I love you.
-She: And what does it mean to love for you?
-He: I think it means that I want your happiness above all else.
-She: Then I thank you very much, but I must say I just need you and want you mostly and maybe I love you, but very little.
-He: Well, me too, to be honest.
-She: That´s right, lets keep it honest.
